it's 5:04 am. i'm awake. ugh. insomnia kicking in again? i did sleep some last night, after a really great day out with my husband. he's off again today, and we have a lot of errand on our plate today, starting EARLY. it looks like a crock pot sort of day for dinner.
up until a few minutes ago, i was blissfully curled up in bed, with an extra duvet on the bed (it's COOOOLD HERE!) with my little italian greyhound curled up by my side, between hubby and i, my big girl, blanche, our diluted grey tortie adopted from my niece curled up at my feet. let's just say, i couldn't move. all snug in our bed, until the pup decided she wanted to be a foot warmer. okay by me, i need that, too. listening to Iz singing on Pandora, what could be wrong with the world?
i don't know what it is about that song, but it always gets me. we played it a lot for our daughter, in her nursery when she was a baby. she knew Iz before most kids know Raffi. thankfully, she still doesn't know Raffi. (joke to my sister.) i'm very quietly singing it to the dog, and a tear runs down my face. yes, this song ALWAYS gets me. the pooch is pushing her head back against me, into the song, and she feels a tear on her neck. she turns around and licks the tear off my face. thank you, God, for the unconditional love of dogs.
so i'm hoping fo r another good day with my husband. i'm at that age that hormonal mood swings are kicking in, and i don't always have control of my moods, and I DO NOT LIKE IT. i'm the sort of person that dislikes not having control of everything. i'm a type A, and i don't deny it. i OWN that type A personality. i've tried for years to relax. yes, my house is a mess, but it drives me nuts. ugh, it drives me CRAZY some days. i need to let it go, i try, but....
anyway, i've had a few really good days lately. i've had a few REALLY good days. everyone has been great, i've been happy mom again, the person i used to know. and love. i like happy mom, she's a nice person, a good person. unhappy mom is a bit of, well....a bitch. she harps on everything and just isn't a nice person. happy mom has been in residence lately and life has been good. i just wish happy mom could get everyone else motivated to get their part of the projects that need to get done around here at least started. THAT is the biggest cause of my frustration. i don't know how to request we get the projects started any longer, without sounding like a nag or banshee. it's been seven years on my cabinets. i think i've been patient enough. time to get cracking on this. we've got the paint, we've got the supplies, LET'S GET T HIS DONE! always one reason or another. *sigh*
so, i feel like i'm singing the same old song, but i need to change the verses around. any suggestions? we have furniture to build, painting to do, a new floor to put in, no small tasks. and i cannot do this alone. and the funds to hire someone are not there. it's strictly DIY, except the floor. if i don't change the tune, unhappy mom is going to return, and i don't want her to. oh, i need help on this one. ALL HANDS ON DECK!
i need to sneak in a few more hours of sleep. in three hours i'll be out in the cold, selling tickets for the PTA spaghetti dinner. i hope this goes well. with only 5 of us working with the organization, in a school of over 700 students, we're really behind the 8 ball. must remember to dress warm.
for now, i think i'll go forget myself in the glorious caramel tones of nat king cole. at least he thinks i'm "unforgettable." and that's a different verse.
good morning, world.
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